"And the mighty legions of the dark came, and there were sevenscore by sevenscore marching, like a wave of all-consuming fire upon the land, and they were lead by a triumvirate of the Damned, seated upon black steeds of Night, each resolute and solid, their Sins in the past and forgotten. Corrupted before they attained power, the three now existed solely to rub their success in the Holy Light (except for that other universal purpose, the search for the perfect wildflower calendar)." - Aktahn Dar the Sage
"The acquisition of a desirable commodity is the basis of most of society's pursuits; now, if you were to make your chosen commodity something like water, it is insanely easy to be satisfied with your life. If you instead choose to search for something more elusive like a one-eyed ostrich that can tap dance, you will find yourself constantly frustrated and discontent. In that vein, this web page will help you learn a lot about being satisfied by a little." - The Chunky Munkiness Web Journal
And so the Net has cast ye upon this beach, this desert of the unholy, where the evil dwells and pulsates, and grows stronger, until it rears up like some great shadow beast that looks sort of like a big bear and consumes your soul, dousing you in its pestilent unholiness as it gnaws contentedly on your skull. Please don't take any of this personally.
Or, an alternate route to a whole different paradigm: The Waddellification